“How do you spell love?” Asked Piglet
“You don’t spell it, you feel it.” Answered Pooh
Ask a hundred people to describe what love is, and you’re likely to get a hundred different answers.
It can be a complicated topic because for most of us, our history with love is well… complicated…
We first learn about love in our childhood homes where from a kid’s perspective, it’s so easy to feel like love is something we need to earn – we’re loved when we’re “good” but we’re rejected when we’re “bad”.
Even with the best of parental intentions, as kids we are likely to associate love with who we need to be for the people who raise us.
Outside of our home and as we grow older we tend to repeat the same pattern, “who do I need to be in order to be acceptable and be loved in return?”
It’s easy to see how the meaning we make of love becomes distorted, how “love” becomes a desperate transaction that buys approval but always feels as though it’s about to slip out of our grasp. We have learned that without the acceptance of some other human we are incomplete.
“When we’re incomplete, we’re always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we’re still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on – serial polygamy – until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimension to our lives, we – each of us – are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.” – Tom Robbins
While we believe that our wholeness is dependent on something or someone being added to our lives, we will always be disappointed in the humans around us – because no one is perfect enough to always say just the right thing. And we’ll always be disappointed in ourselves – because when we feel rejected, it must mean that we’re not good enough.
When you finally come to the very deep realization that the only acceptance that you need is from YOU, then your wholeness becomes something that is established from within, and then love is no longer something that you need, but something that you share.
Loving from wholeness radiates from you and doesn’t ask for anything in return, because when you are whole, there’s absolutely nothing that you “need”.
“True love begins when nothing is looked for in return.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupery
“We come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” – Sam Keen
The “complicated” topic of love, suddenly becomes very simple when you look in the mirror and like the person you see.
Here are some guiding mantras for a Friday filled with love:
- “My self-worth is inherent and independent of external validation.”
- “I choose love and acceptance for myself, cultivating inner peace and radiating it outwards.”
- “I am a work in progress, and my journey of self-discovery is a source of constant growth and joy.”
Happy Friday beautiful human! Remember, love isn’t something you need – it’s something you are. When you embrace your wholeness, you become a beacon of love, sharing it freely with the world around you. Join us if you’d like to explore this concept further through meditation and connect with the love that flows abundantly within you.
– pierre –
Today’s LIVE meditation is: Sharing love.
(credit: https://www.benjaminhoffauthor.com/ )