Need a little spark of inspiration? This article is a delightful 2-minute detour. But if you’re enjoying the scenic route today, our menu is packed with even more captivating landscapes to explore.
A message from today’s meditation:
Love can be a difficult concept to describe, trying to use words that clearly can’t do it justice. It’s a word thrown around so often, yet its true essence can be so hard to pin down. We chase after it in relationships, yearn for its presence, and sometimes feel lost when it seems absent. But what if the key to experiencing love was not at all about receiving it, but about giving it freely?
Alan Cohen is our teacher this week, so let’s take a look at his descriptions of love:
“We believe we are hurt when we don’t receive love. But that is not what hurts us. Our pain comes when we do not give love. We were born to love. You might say that we are divinely created love machines. We function most powerfully when we are giving love. The world has led us to believe that our well-being is dependent on other people loving us. But this is kind of upside down thinking that has caused so many of our problems. The truth is our well being is dependent on our giving love. It is not about what comes back; it is about what goes out!” – Alan Cohen
“The door you open to give love is the very one through which love arrives.” – Alan Cohen
Showing up as love. Being the example of what love ‘is’ in human form, is our natural state. We might have been ‘taught’ not to be so open with our love. We might have been hurt or shamed in the past and then chosen to live with our hearts closed, but this always ends up hurting us because a closed heart can neither give nor receive.
“Waiting does not exist in the experience of those who recognize the presence of love wherever they are.” – Alan Cohen
Showing up as love means there is never a period of ‘waiting’ for love, because you are always living ‘in’ love.
“The deeper you love yourself, the more the universe will affirm your worth.” – Alan Cohen
“Love is heaven and fear is hell. Where you place your attention is where you live.” – Alan Cohen
The people who have learned this truth from their journey, show up as the embodiment of love. They ask nothing of you because they are already full. They see through your fears to the being that you are.
“Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.” – Alan Cohen
But the people who love you are human too and sometimes their own fears might get the better of them, so try not to judge them in the moments that they succumb to their own fears.
A few questions to help deepen your expression of love:
- How can I show up as love in my interactions today?
- Where am I holding back love, out of fear or past experiences?
- What small act of kindness can I offer someone today?
- Can I extend the same compassion I offer others to myself?
Remember, love is a practice. The more we extend love to everything around us, the more we experience its transformative power in our own lives.
Wishing you a beautiful Friday!
– pierre –
Today’s LIVE meditation is: Sharing love.
A moment of reflection
(If you have the time, use this question as a journal prompt, because whenever you put pen to paper you’re wiring the neural pathways that create your new habits. But if you don’t have the time, just take a moment to reflect on your response.)
Confronting Your Heart’s Protective Barriers: “We might have been hurt or shamed in the past and then chosen to live with our hearts closed, but this always ends up hurting us because a closed heart can neither give nor receive.”
Identify one relationship or area of your life where you know you’re holding back love due to fear, past wounds, or self-protection. Describe the specific walls you’ve built and the story you tell yourself about why they’re necessary. Now imagine yourself as a wise, loving observer looking at this protected part of you with complete compassion. What would this loving observer say about the cost of keeping your heart closed? What small step could you take today to begin opening this guarded space, not because you should, but because you recognize that your own aliveness depends on it?
Today’s LIVE meditation
https://youtu.be/q26vccrnYm8 2025
https://youtu.be/pj69faq3YuU 2024
https://youtu.be/tIlcEOm3xqA 2023
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lBts72GBAfM 2022
Q&A for deeper learning
1. Q: If I focus on giving love instead of receiving it, won’t I become a doormat or get taken advantage of?
A: There’s a crucial difference between giving love from wholeness and giving from emptiness. When you give love because you ARE love, you maintain healthy boundaries and self-respect. You’re not giving to get something back or to fix someone else—you’re expressing your authentic nature. True love includes saying no when necessary, holding others accountable, and treating yourself with the same compassion you extend to others. Giving love from fullness actually makes you stronger and more discerning, not weaker.
2. Q: How can I love someone who has hurt me deeply? Doesn’t this philosophy ignore the reality of pain and betrayal?
A: Loving someone doesn’t mean excusing their harmful behavior or allowing them to continue hurting you. It means seeing through their actions to the wounded person beneath, while still protecting yourself and maintaining appropriate boundaries. You can love someone from a distance, forgive for your own peace, and choose not to engage with their harmful behavior. The goal isn’t to become a target for others’ unhealed wounds, but to free yourself from carrying the poison of resentment while making wise choices about who you allow close to you.
3. Q: What if I’ve been hurt so many times that I genuinely don’t know how to open my heart again? Where do I even start?
A: Start with the smallest possible gesture toward yourself. Perhaps it’s speaking to yourself with kindness for one moment, or acknowledging your pain without judgment. Healing happens in micro-steps, not giant leaps. You might begin by loving something neutral—a pet, nature, or even a stranger you’ll never see again. The heart remembers how to love through practice, not through forcing. Be patient with yourself; a heart that’s been closed for protection needs time to trust that it’s safe to open again.
4. Q: How do I know if I’m truly loving myself or just being selfish and self-indulgent?
A: Self-love and selfishness have completely different energy signatures. Self-love feels peaceful, sustainable, and actually increases your capacity to care for others. It involves treating yourself with the same kindness you’d show a good friend—being honest about your needs, setting healthy boundaries, and making choices that honor your wellbeing. Selfishness feels grasping, fearful, and often comes at others’ expense. When you truly love yourself, you naturally want to contribute to others’ happiness because you’re operating from abundance rather than scarcity.
5. Q: Is it realistic to expect that I can feel love all the time? What about when I’m angry, frustrated, or going through difficult times?
A: Being love doesn’t mean feeling blissful every moment—it means remembering your loving essence even during challenging emotions. You can be angry about injustice while still loving the person who created it. You can feel frustrated while maintaining compassion for yourself in that frustration. Love isn’t a feeling you have to manufacture; it’s your natural state that remains constant beneath all temporary emotions. The practice is learning to access this love even when other feelings are present, not replacing all other emotions with love.
6. Q: How can I practice this philosophy with people who seem completely closed off to love or who actively reject kindness?
A: Some people have been so wounded that they perceive love as a threat and will push away anyone who tries to connect with them. In these cases, loving them might mean respecting their need for distance while holding them in your heart from afar. You can love someone without trying to convince them to receive your love. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is simply not take their rejection personally and continue to see their inherent worth even when they can’t see it themselves. This doesn’t mean you have to keep subjecting yourself to their rejection—you can love them and choose not to engage.
7. Q: What’s the difference between this approach to love and the codependent patterns I’m trying to heal from?
A: Codependency comes from a place of emptiness—trying to fill your own needs by controlling or fixing others. It’s driven by fear, attachment to outcomes, and often involves losing yourself in another person’s problems. Loving from wholeness means you’re already complete and offer love freely without needing anything in return. You maintain your own identity, respect others’ autonomy, and don’t try to rescue or change anyone. The key difference is that codependency is fear-based giving (what can I get?), while authentic love is abundance-based giving (what can I offer?). If you find yourself anxious about someone’s response to your love, you’re likely operating from codependency rather than authentic love.