Compassion or, the importance of having compassion is a familiar melody in personal growth circles. Even so, self-compassion seems to remain an undeveloped skill. Not because we don’t try, but if our “shortcomings” were treated harshly while we grew up, then it’s likely that we struggle having acceptance for ourselves unless we’re being “perfect”.
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.” – Jack Kornfield
Today’s meditation is an exploration of SELF with the intent to see if we can find compassion for ourselves, even for the parts we don’t like.
“The emotional wisdom of the heart is simple. When we accept our human feelings, a remarkable transformation occurs. Tenderness and wisdom arise naturally and spontaneously. Where we once sought strength over others, now our strength becomes our own; where we once sought to defend ourselves, we laugh.” – Jack Kornfield
Most of us were taught that we are only acceptable when we display the “best” aspects of ourselves, that the moment we struggle or feel a bit low we are unacceptable.
“Ours is a society of denial that conditions us to protect ourselves from any direct difficulty and discomfort. We expend enormous energy denying our insecurity, fighting pain, death and loss and hiding from the basic truths of the natural world and of our own nature.” – Jack Kornfield
One of the basic truths of being human is that some days we’ll feel heavy and some days we’ll feel light. Some days we feel the darkness and other days we feel like light itself. How do we become better at navigating all of these “good” and “bad” feelings while continuing to become better at including ourselves in our circle of compassion?
Jack has simple and practical advice for how to open our arms to ourselves:
“As we willingly enter each place of fear, each place of deficiency and insecurity in ourselves, we will discover that its walls are made of untruths, of old images of ourselves, of ancient fears, of false ideas of what is pure and what is not.” – Jack Kornfield
This is how we’ll do it:
Not turning away from what scares us any more. No more numbing out. No more running away. Facing and accepting our own “pretty and also ugly” until we can look upon ourselves with kind eyes, appreciating just how hard this human has been trying.
When we have acceptance for our human feelings a remarkable transformation occurs, we gain access to the strongest part of our SELF. We step into the inner strength that is able to hold all of this. We are introduced to our soul.
By having acceptance of our big emotions, we get beyond them.
Here are some guiding mantras for your journey of self-compassion:
- I am worthy of love and acceptance, just as I am.
- All emotions are valid. I allow myself to feel them without judgment.
- I am on a lifelong journey of self-discovery. There will be stumbles, but I will extend compassion to myself throughout the process.
- I will cultivate patience and understanding towards my human imperfections.
Join us for today’s meditation and see if you too can find a place in your heart for every part of you.
– pierre –
Today’s LIVE meditation is: A sense of self.
(image credit: Pacific Standard https://psmag.com/social-justice/placing-hand-heart-promotes-honesty-77223)