Have you ever wondered how we can create a world in which people judge and criticise each other less? How do we move closer to a world in which we all allow one another to be human?
That’s a tall order right? But could we at least see a starting point? How would we start taking a step in the right direction? Swami Vivekananda has some great advice for us on the first step – we start by each taking a good look at ourselves, and learning to love the human in the mirror a little more every day.
“If I love myself despite my infinite faults, how can I hate anyone at the glimpse of a few faults.” – Swami Vivekananda
The sad truth is that for the most part we were all taught the following lesson, “no you’re not allowed to just be human!” We all hold too much shame, guilt and self judgement over everything that we’ve done ‘wrong’, and it’s only when we can look at our own shortcomings with kindness that we’re able to allow the people around us to also just be human.
So how do we create a kinder inner narrative? How do we look upon ourselves with kindness, especially since we are all so flawed?
“Talk to yourself at least once in a day… otherwise you may miss a meeting with an EXCELLENT person in this World.” – Swami Vivekananda
I really LOVE the self-kindness that emanates from the way he describes how we should cherish every interaction with our “self”.
This advice is actually quite practical. This is literally what I do with clients every day. Does it sound strange to deliberately talk to yourself?
Here’s a question for you? In the moments when your inner-critic is very loud… how do you talk to yourself…?
It tends to be true that talking to ourselves harshly comes quite naturally, yet it seems ‘weird’ to deliberately talk to ourselves in a positive way. When we don’t consciously create an empowering inner narrative, then we are left with only the wounded inner voices that we took on board in childhood.
The truth is, creating a kinder inner narrative takes practice. We’ve all spent years (perhaps even decades) accumulating those old, critical voices. And just like any other skill, it takes conscious effort and repetition to create and reinforce a new, supportive inner narrative.
A few thoughts for self-reflection:
- Acknowledge your inner critic. Notice the harsh self-talk without judgment.
- Reframe the narrative. Instead of “I’m a failure,” try “This was a setback, but I can learn from it and try again.”
- Extend self-compassion. Imagine talking to a friend in that situation. What words of encouragement would you offer them? Use those same words for yourself.
- Focus on progress, not perfection. We are all works in progress. Celebrate your efforts and growth.
Remember, a kinder inner voice ripples outward. By treating ourselves with compassion, we create space for a more accepting and compassionate world for everyone.
Join-in on today’s meditation to learn how to become more deliberate about your own inner-narratives.
– pierre –
Today’s LIVE meditation is: A sense of self.